Two Weeks Notice

I'm told that exactly two weeks from today, I will be leaving the country. I will supposedly be hopping on an airplane in Chicago, and landing hours later in this place called Spain where I will purportedly spend the next four months of my life. I guess maybe I'm in denial. It doesn't seem real at all. Lots of people have told me that is normal though. They say that it won't really sink in until I'm actually there so I shouldn't stress about it too much now. I guess that makes sense.

My emotions about this trip change about every ten seconds. Honestly, I am at least a little bit excited about it. As of now I still have no idea where I'll be living or who I'll live with. I don't even know for sure what classes I'll be taking. But those things don't bother me too much since it's not like I can do anything about that from here anyway. I am excited about the prospect of traveling to a new continent, of living in a different country, and of experiencing Spanish/European culture.

But I'm really scared too. I'd say that the scariest thing right now is the thought of saying goodbye. I hate goodbyes. I hate change...I always have. It's been so weird (sad, lonely, etc.) this week to think of everyone taking J-term classes at Taylor without me. I'm going to visit this weekend, but I dread the goodbyes that will come at the end of the visit. And after that, I'll have a week to say goodbye to my family and friends here. I've never been so far away from all the people I know and love for so long. I'm afraid of what that will be like. I'm afraid of missing people. I'm also afraid of packing, afraid of having to do everything in Spanish, afraid of a lot of things. And I think that these next two weeks are going to go a lot faster than I think they are...